Wow…that title was a mouthful of yuck to type out. I feel like it was flying a banner of “Hey, look at me, I’m a 10 star diamond elite coach.” I know that doesn’t mean a lot to most people reading, unless you’re an insider in the business. My team had to convince me to use it for Google rankings or something I don’t know much about. Social media is powerful, it’s just hard to hear someone’s heart under it sometimes, so I’m hoping you’ll read this and hear every bit of mine in this post!
My heart is for the people I work with, my heart is for my WHY, and the dedication to a vision that is much bigger than a paycheck. When I first started out… I was in a place of needing life change. I had to find my WHY in order to keep moving. My why came from asking myself question like:
- What are you willing to fight for?
- What are you settling for?
- What has just become “it is what it is” – because it’s never just it is what it is.
My AHA moments
For me, it was on several different occasions that caused me to move deeper into WHY I needed a change. When my husband Chad deployed the first time, the drive home felt like I was frozen in time. Everything was happening around me, but it blurred together. Almost as if I couldn’t feel anything, but felt it all at the same time. The pressure I felt that was on my shoulders was intense and while I’m not a depressed person, the weight of it all had me asking, “Why do I feel this way?” One morning when I went down the stairs and saw that quote I always refer to hit me straight on.
“If you want something different you have to do something different.”
This was the start of change and my WHY for family! My WHY for fitness began as I peeled back layer after layer – it was painful, it was raw, and it was amazingly worth every tear, ever struggle and obstacle I overcame. I had to keep asking myself questions like “Why is this a struggle? How does it affect me?” I had never felt comfortable in my own skin. Even as a personal trainer!!! That’s where the REAL changes started to happen in me. When the inside starts to change, the outside can’t help itself. It starts to look different too.
As women, we’re “supposed” to be strong, supermoms, perfect examples and blah blah blah. We’re supposed to be superheroes and you know what? Our capes are stuck in the door – the layers of ‘stuff’ we handle and push down run deep and the emotions tend to come out when we realize what it is we’re actually willing to fight for and that we can’t just handle it all.
I’ve heard a lot of really nice WHY’s over the years. Family. Get out of debt. Personal Time. But that doesn’t do it for me and it shouldn’t for you either. Here’s why. It’s passive. It doesn’t elicit as response or action.
How Do YOU Find Your Why?
I’ll give you an example:
Me: Tell me WHY you want to do this (Challenge, coaching opportunity, change your life….)
Challenger: To pay off debt
Me: In my heart I can already feel like there is more, deeper. When the alarm goes off, is that what pushes you?
Challenger: Not really.
Me: So you’re not shouting “I’m going to pay off debt!! And then rush to workout out or set aside time for personal development at 5am wake up call?”
Me: Dig Deeper.
Challenger: Well the debt is a major issue because my husband and I have a lot of stress because of it.
Challenger: My husband and I aren’t connecting in our marriage because of the stress and we’re drifting further and further apart. (BINGO! This is your WHY)
To reconnect with your husband in a way that you both desire so much, but can’t grasp that with the ‘stuff’ you have on your shoulders.
Yes! That is it! That is your why. Your relationships! Raw and uncomfortable – once you’re uncomfortable it starts getting real. I’m jumping up and down behind the computer screen. Can you see me? This stuff is the secret sauce! It’s the stuff of legends. It’s creating a legacy for you, your family, your kids, your life. The debt or the stress or the kids or the job that’s working you to the bone….it’s all part of it. The WHY is asking yourself “What am I settling for and how is it affecting me.”
What are you willing to fight for?
If you know me, you know my heart is NEVER to be about selling someone on a challenge group. I could and blow things out of the water and I’d be a great sales woman. But why? Just to make a quick buck and have that challenger feel like they were just a number? No…it’s much much deeper than that for me.
It’s never about the money (sure I know, I can say that because I don’t have to worry about money…it’s been said. The elephant in the room has been cleared). Wanna know something?? We’ve lived on a military family salary, much longer than I’ve made 6-figures. I made hardly anything (under $2000) in my first year as a coach. It wasn’t because I didn’t try or push or create good relationships. It’s because I knew that starting this whole process was an investment. It wasn’t going to happen overnight. Just like a good friend, you aren’t going to know that person and dig deep with that person in one conversation. Don’t let that little example fool you. That could take weeks, months, or even years with some people. That’s why to me, it’s not about the 12 star ranking. Ask me if I care if my rank drops. I know that statement could come across in two ways:
- She doesn’t care about her business and isn’t thankful for what she has
- She is super arrogant and thinks she’ll never lose what she has
I’ve come to a good place in the last year that allows me to realize, people are entitled to say or think whatever they want. But how I let it affect me and be part of my story is my choice. You may be shaking your head right now in disagreement with me. That’ okay! Because each night I lay down my head on my pillow I want to be successful in two ways: I want to be proud of how I spent my time and handled my relationships. That’s it. It’s a constant work in progress because of all the things I have in life to balance. It’s never perfect. It never will be and that’s just fine with me. It’s about progress, not perfection…I could go into that more, but that’s for another post!
My Story and Who I Am
My story runs very deep. Creating a team and a business that has allowed me TIME and memory making with my husband and kids in a way that I wouldn’t have had 5 years ago is awesome. Being able to visit family when we want, make memories on long hauls for the military, and invest in my kids is incredible. So that’s a piece of my story.
I’m a mom, a wife, a 12 star combined diamond elite who behind all the titles, is just a women, super invested in helping others feel comfortable in their own skin because I know what kind of life change that can create as you journey towards a healthier and happier YOU. It’s a journey and I love walking it with each person that comes into my life.